THE STEWART CONUNDRUM
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| "I'm just a comedian, except when I'm not." |
Jon Stewart, the outgoing host of The Daily Show, has been getting criticized, mostly in conservative media for meeting with President Obama in the run-up to and during the 2012 election. Stewart's been trying to deflect the criticism with his usual defence of "I'm just a comedian" that he brings out in between telling people that he's the most trusted source of news for the millennial generation for which he's paid $30 million a year, more than Leno & Letterman despite averaging 1/3 of their ratings.
All I really have to say is to offer a little thought experiment: How would Jon Stewart react if a rival satirist had secret meetings with a Republican president and his material was seen as having a pro-Republican slant?
He would shit kittens and go after that rival with both hands as a craven political toady.
You know he would.
FEAR THE WALKING SPIN-OFF
AMC is doing a spin-off from their mega-hit The Walking Dead, called Fear The Walking Dead, and are hoping to have some sort of crossover with the flagship in some future season.
Here's what I would like the spin-off show to do.
At the end of the first season, they find a solution to the zombie problem, and clean it up to the point where life quickly goes back to normal. However, they run out of money to clean up the zombies in a narrow corridor between Atlanta and Alexandria. For the rest of the show's run it's just a family-based kitchen-sink drama with only occasional scenes of characters wondering if any living people are still in the zombie zone and then going, "Nyah, we run the evacuation instructions during every PBS pledge break, they're bound to have seen it."
That also opens the door for The Walking Dead finale to feature the last surviving character finally stumbling out of the quarantined zombie zone and going "Aw shit."
PEZ ME OFF
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| "AAAAAGGGHH!! MY THROAT!" |
Some producers are planning to make a Pez Movie. Yep a movie about those little candy dispenser that look like candy's being ripped out of a cartoon character's throat.
Time to put a big "CLOSED: OUT OF IDEAS" sign out on Hollywood.
What the hell is a 'blended family of school teachers?'
ReplyDeleteI like your idea. A plague of walking not running but walking zombies would last about thirty minutes in any rural red county in America.
Bob see's TWD coming from the cemetery
"BANG" Bob shoots one. The local police arrive and at first point their guns at Bob then see a very dead person munching on Bob's dog or something.
"BANG"
Cop 'Sorry Bob, I thought you'd gone nuts or something. Shit I think I'm going nuts. I better call the county guys and let them know that city cannibal plague has reached here.'
"BANG" Cop and Bob shoot another zombie.
Cop -"Hey Bob get you're neighbors together and see who's armed and who ain't and check on Mrs Dodge, she ain't got nobody to look out for her anymore."
Bob- "You get going and get us some reinforcements. I'll get the neighbors ready and don't worry about Mrs Dodge we'll take care of her."
Rural county gets organized in a day or so and everyone is protected by men with guns. Roving gangs from the cities never make it past the hidden road blocks and snipers. Most of the adult men have military service and it takes no time to organize them.
The high school chemistry teacher and the local machine shop get together to produce ammunition. Farmers and ranchers keep the food coming and the milita protect their herds from zombies and human raiders.
Prominently feature American values and Christian charity and real guns and real shooting.
Rake in the bajillion dollars that middle America will throw at you.