Saturday, 9 February 2008

Fun & Games: Adaptation Fabulation

You know, it's time for a little reader participation.

I've been entertaining you, now it's your turn to entertain me. Besides with the writer's strike moving into the realm of contract language and legalese, and not in the vague theories I specialize in, I need filler material.

This is a game I used to play on a film forum a few years ago before the poseurs took it over, and it was inspired by a hoax-story about Orson Welles, a known fan of comic books, trying to make his own all-star version of Batman, only to have it nixed in pre-production.

But it got me thinking.

Imagine that you have an unlimited budget, a favourite novel/comic book you want to adapt, and a time-machine capable of getting you any actor from movie history to star in it.

Now, what story would you adapt, and what stars from the past or present would you have starring in it.

Post your ideas in the comments section and be sure to have at least a nickname to go with it. Don't be anonymous, be loud and proud.

Try it and let your imagination run wild, it's actually a lot of fun.


  1. prisoner1059/2/08 10:12 pm

    I would adapt the following comics:

    *Stormwatch by Micah Ian Wright. The hook: special forces teams with no powers to speak of have to take out terrorist supervillains while the superheros stand idly by or somewhat protect them. Mostly non-superpowered guys win by teamwork and ruthlessness and LEADERSHIP. Written by a former spec ops guy who knows that environment.

    Starring: Daniel Day Lewis as Santini, with Samuel L Jackson, Adam Baldwin, Rob Morrow, and Viggo Mortenson.

    Michael Mann to direct.

    *Wildcats 3.0. The hook, a broken up Superteam has the remnants re-uniting to remake society by not superheroics but using superhero technology in a corporation to make the world better. With superheroics on the side as a "childish distraction."

    Starring: Sean Bean as Spartan, Colin Ferrel as Grifter, Javier Bardem as Noir, Matthew McConaughey as Agent Wax, DB Woodside as Edwin Dolby (accountant and reluctant superhero), and Andrea Parker as CC Rendozzo.

    Martin Scorsese (Taxi Driver era) to direct.

  2. snap_pop_no_crackle9/2/08 11:10 pm

    I'd choose Frank Miller's Dark Knight Returns with a young Jack Nicholson as Batman and Bruce Dern as Two-Face.

  3. Dark Kibble10/2/08 10:51 am

    I would adapt Masashi Kishimoto's "Naruto."

    The basic story is as follows: A giant fox attacks the Village Hidden in the Leaves. The ninjas of the village suffer major casualties, but are unable to kill it. So the village leader sacrifices his life to seal the fox inside a newborn named Naruto. The actual story picks up 12 years later, when Naruto graduates from the Ninja Academy.

    Since it is an ongoing series, I would adapt only its very first story arc where Naruto and his team are hired to go to a foreign country to guard a bridge construction crew from bandits, but find themselves fighting far tougher opponents, since the old man that hired them hid the true magnitude of the danger to get a discount on the ninjas' services. Of course, some slight alterations would have to be made to allow for prominent use of the English language.

    Since we're using time machines, I would cast the a young Macaulay Culkin as Naruto, (current) Emma Watson as his crush Sakura, and a younger Jackie Chan as his rival Sasuke.

    For the two main villains, I'd use Ken Watanabe as Zabuza and a young Jet Li as his adopted son Haku.

  4. Dark Kibble10/2/08 10:54 am

    Oh, I forgot. Jerry Bruckheimer would direct.

  5. Dark Knight Returns:
    How could you not adapt this one?
    Robert De Niro as Batman, Mark Hammill as Joker (he does great on the voice), not sure who would work as the new girl Robin.

    The Dark Phoenix Saga: Done as a new trilogy of X-Men movies so it doesn't get scrunched down. The story would focus on Jean's ascension to godhood in the first movie, her corruption by the Hellfire club in the second movie, and her arrest and suicide in the third movie.

    I'd downplay the more fantastic elements. Instead of going into space they would stay on earth. Instead of destroying the alien world D'Bari she would basically 'phoenix nuke' a city on earth.

    Instead of being arrested by the Shiar empire, she would be arrested by the US Government.

    Actors: Keep the ones from the first X-Men movies, pretend X-Men 3 never happened.

  6. ___I would love to release movies based on Sci Fi novels that where bastardized by tree hugging liberals to fit their dementia.
    ___A perfect example would be "Starship Troopers" by Robert Heinlein. But instead of releasing a faithful adaptation of his work, I would exploit what was made by that Netherlands idiot. It would star an actual Philippine native actor as "Johnny" Rico now hardened by the war nearing the end. I would use All of the stories within the original to show the audience what they missed and to sweetened the deal. I'd have the original actor Van Dien show up as an scared beaten man playing as the "actor" of a C-movie called Starship Troopers near the beginning of the war.
    ___You see, even in the future, liberals still exist. He might be redeemed as a Cap Troop or even better, a broken drunk with a failed career showing up & selling midnight commercial crap stumbled upon by Rico during the night while he's relaxing after finishing a hard College course assignment to become an Officer!

  7. "*Stormwatch by Micah Ian Wright. The hook: special forces teams with no powers to speak of have to take out terrorist supervillains while the superheros stand idly by or somewhat protect them. Mostly non-superpowered guys win by teamwork and ruthlessness and LEADERSHIP. Written by a former spec ops guy who knows that environment."

    I hate to break this to you, but Micah Ian Wright fabricated his military service in a pathetic attempt to add credence to his anti-war views. He was later humiliatingly exposed. It was quite a big deal in 2004, I'm surprised you didn't know about it already.

  8. In the wake of Pirates of the Carribean and Lord of the Rings, "Tellos" --the comic by Todd Dezago and the late Mike Weringo--is just begging to be adapted into a movie....

    Also, "Meridain" from the failed GrossGen Comics. I think Disney has the rights to it now, which would work out great, if they'd actually do it. Animate it, and Stephie (the heroine) would make a very different addition to Disney's 'princess' line. Derren Beq (the mentor/femme fatale) would also be a nice new character to have around. And Jad (the love interest) would just rock.

    But also, Meridain should become a movie (trilogy) because it has one of the best lines I've seen in a comic. Its from a grizzled veteran who meets our heroine and says (well, in an inner monologue) "Oh this is a joke and half! Princess Peace doesn't want any nasty ugly in her cute lil' war!" Again, something like that just begs to be put on screen...