Hollywood Babble On & On #114: Points to Ponder

I guess I should open with a tip of my saucy sombrero to the always edifying & erudite Nikki Finke for these stories...

1. SAG has released a statement declaring consensus on the key demands for their next contract. Sadly, I think it is too little too late. This statement, or something like it, should have been released jointly with AFTRA months ago. However both unions had their own agendas, which seem to be mostly slagging not only each other, but their own respective memberships.

This whole contract has been a strategic and tactical boondoggle from day one. They will both probably have to eat a real stinkbug of a contract this year, so I suggest that both unions immediately find more amenable leadership, solve all internal issues, and take off the blinders that their real adversary is the AMPTP.

2. Sony and Fox are trying to get the WGA writers of a new prime-time animated show put under an IATSE contract the predominantly Saturday morning animation writers work under. And reports are saying that both Sony (the producer) and Fox (the broadcaster) repeatedly assured the writers and show-runners that they would work under the WGA contract.

Now this is a recipe for failure. The art of producing movies and television is all about relationships, especially in TV where people, especially writers, work together day to day for sometimes years on end. I'm not saying that the studio has to be a doormat, but diplomacy is important, because resentment and hostility is not a solid foundation for a long running hit show. Especially when the resentment and hostility is sparked even before the show hits the air. It shows a major blunder on the part of the corporate management, and IATSE to start playing silly games with the talent at this stage, because what's the good of a show, if the channel can't show it, the audience can't see it, and advertisers can't buy time on?


3. The large and semi-demi-godlike Creative Artists Agency who won't even get out of bed for anything less than a $10 million contract, are being criticized for how they treat their assistants. Apparently the poor benighted assistants have to dwell to an underground cavern and wait half the lifetime of a Fox TV drama to get their car out of stack parking.

Now with the past WGA strike, and the most likely upcoming SAG strike in their air I started thinking about just what would happen if Hollywood's assistants went on strike.

The following joke started as one of my lame comments at Deadline Hollywood, but I figured I'd share them here, and flog the dead horse for a bit.

HEADLINES COVERING HOLLYWOOD ASSISTANTS STRIKE

NEW YORK TIMES:

PRODUCER FOUND DEAD OF STARVATION 50 FEET FROM CRAFT SERVICES TABLE– UNABLE TO FEED SELF

LOS ANGELES TIMES:

MANAGER COMMITTED AFTER FOUND ROAMING SKID ROW, SCREAMING: “WHERE THE HELL IS MY LATTE!”

USA TODAY:

STUDIO EXECUTIVE ARRESTED IN PUBLIC WASHROOM FOR SOLICITATION– DEFENSE SAYS HE WAS JUST TRYING TO HIRE A “WIPER”

VARIETY:

ANGRY ASSISTANTS ANKLE, AGENTS ANGSTY

HOLLYWOOD REPORTER:

DOES ANYONE STILL READ US?

Now that's a terrifying vision of things to come.