I am the very model of a modern Movie-Mogul,
I've information political, financial, and mineral,
I know the heads of Studios, and I know box-office historical
From Star Wars to The Dark Knight, in order categorical;
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters cinematical,
I understand foreign films, both the simple and enigmatical,
About the Oscars I'm teeming with a lot o' news,
With my expense account acting as my muse.
My studio's books require differential calculus;
I call my assistant a snivelling li'l homonculous:
In short, in matters political, financial, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Movie-Mogul.
I know Hollywood history, Bug Bunny said What's up doc's;
I'm fashionably agnostic, my career is a paradox,
I quote in statistics all the hits of Michael Bay,
In meetings I can floor martinis all day;
I can tell unformed Spielbergs from Uwe Bolls and Ed Woods,
I ignore their croaking critics as long as they bring in the goods!
Then I can rewrite my contract to pay myself more and more,
And snort cocaine off the buttocks of a Tunisian whore.
Then I submit receipts in Babylonic cuneiform,
To buy my mistress a french maid uniform:
In short, in matters political, financial, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Movie-Mogul.
In fact, when I know what is meant by "development" and "turnaround",
When I can't tell the diff from my arse and a hole in the ground,
When such affairs as premieres and parties I'm more happy at,
And that I know precisely when an actress has become too fat,
When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gadgetry,
When I know nothing without my precious Blackberry—
In short, when I've a smattering of inter-office strategy—
You'll say a better Movie-Mogul has never sat a-gee.
For my cinematic knowledge, though it's plucky and adventury,
Only really goes back to the beginning of this century;
But since I just inherited this job from my uncle,
I am the very model of a modern Movie-Mogul.
I've information political, financial, and mineral,
I know the heads of Studios, and I know box-office historical
From Star Wars to The Dark Knight, in order categorical;
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters cinematical,
I understand foreign films, both the simple and enigmatical,
About the Oscars I'm teeming with a lot o' news,
With my expense account acting as my muse.
My studio's books require differential calculus;
I call my assistant a snivelling li'l homonculous:
In short, in matters political, financial, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Movie-Mogul.
I know Hollywood history, Bug Bunny said What's up doc's;
I'm fashionably agnostic, my career is a paradox,
I quote in statistics all the hits of Michael Bay,
In meetings I can floor martinis all day;
I can tell unformed Spielbergs from Uwe Bolls and Ed Woods,
I ignore their croaking critics as long as they bring in the goods!
Then I can rewrite my contract to pay myself more and more,
And snort cocaine off the buttocks of a Tunisian whore.
Then I submit receipts in Babylonic cuneiform,
To buy my mistress a french maid uniform:
In short, in matters political, financial, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Movie-Mogul.
In fact, when I know what is meant by "development" and "turnaround",
When I can't tell the diff from my arse and a hole in the ground,
When such affairs as premieres and parties I'm more happy at,
And that I know precisely when an actress has become too fat,
When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gadgetry,
When I know nothing without my precious Blackberry—
In short, when I've a smattering of inter-office strategy—
You'll say a better Movie-Mogul has never sat a-gee.
For my cinematic knowledge, though it's plucky and adventury,
Only really goes back to the beginning of this century;
But since I just inherited this job from my uncle,
I am the very model of a modern Movie-Mogul.
(chuckles) Pretty good take off the pirates of penzan(sp) song. I can sing only the first verse and when I tried yours, most of it flows about the same.
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