Monday, 29 March 2010

Hollywood Babble On & On #479: Miscellaneous Movie/Media/Money Musings

Welcome to the show folks...


Movie theater owners are planning to jack up ticket prices to 3D movies around 20% or more. Now remember, 3D ticket prices are already more expensive than regular movie prices, and this will probably ensure that the 3D fad will eventually crash and burn sooner than I originally predicted. Theater owners defend their move saying that they're trying to bring the industry in line with such "affordable" entertainments as Major League Baseball, and Broadway Musicals that require second mortgages, and the sale of either their children or their vital organs, to buy seats capable of seeing any of the action.

It's only a matter of time before the studios and exhibitors start demanding billions from the government to build their stadiums theaters, because they can't fill them, because everyone's at home, watching hi-def TV and/or playing video games, because they simply can't afford to drop major moolah to take the family out on a movie night. In 1948 65% of people went to the movies on a weekly basis, now it's less than 6%, do they really want it to go all the way down to 0%.


The movie Casino Jack about shady lobbyist Jack Abramoff has landed a distributor. So now moviegoers can ignore it in theaters, instead of just ignoring it at the discount bin at Wal-Mart.


Writer J.D. Shapiro has apologized for writing the legendary big budget steaming pile known as Battlefield Earth. He said that he got involved because an article said that the Scientology center in Hollywood was a good place to meet women.

Gee, do you think that someone from Scientology wrote that article?

Anyway, next thing he knew, he was writing one of the stinkiest movies of all time. Now apologies are all well and good, but there's nothing that redeems a writer more, than not writing shit.

Now I hope to get an apology, and quick from...


...because they're still insisting that their SyFy Channel TV show, which is a mish-mash of
Eureka, Warehouse 13, and The X-Files, is based on the Stephen King novella The Colorado Kid.

It isn't.

I know I've said this before, but I just have to make my point, because these hacks won't quit with this bullshit.

Let's look again at the facts:

Haven- A TV show about a plucky female FBI agent investigating paranormal/supernatural themed cases in a small New England town.

The Colorado Kid- A crime novella about two old newspapermen in a small New England town telling the story of an unsolved death to a plucky female journalism intern.

Just having a plucky female
whatever in a small New England town does make it an adaptation.

It's not even in the same genre.

The only thing Stephen King has to do with this show is that he cashed a check. Now I normally wish people all the success in the world, however, I simply must change my policy because of this rather obvious scam, which is why I'm asking, nay,
pleading, my readers to tell everyone they know, by any means necessary that THEY SHOULD NOT WATCH THIS SHOW.

This show
must fail, it must tank, it must crash and burn.

I hate to say this, but it's the only way to stop this sort of bullshit shell game.

And Stephen King, what's up with you, aren't you rich enough now, or did you lose a lot of money on last year's Super Bowl?


Fox, which distributes the home video product for MGM, is going to make some MGM backlist titles available via on-demand publisher Createspace.

I actually think this is a good idea. Not every movie rates the printing of a million copies when simply having them available on-demand could handle their sales admirably with a minimum outlay.

Now I say take it to the next level.

There's a lot of talk in publishing about a machine called the Expresso or something like that. The idea behind it is that they install the machine in stores, if that store doesn't have the book you want, then you punch it up on the machine, and it will print it for you.

Why can't they do that for DVDs?

It should be a quicker, safer, and better quality alternative to online downloading, especially if they make it affordable, and it'll be a good way to unload the studio back-list to the sort of cinephiles who like their movies off the beaten path.


--then you better fill out this form in total:

The following will serve as an agreement between ____________________ and Tina Fey in regard to their interview for ___________________________ .

Journalist may not use text produced by Tina Fey for any purposes other than what is originally intended without securing the prior written permission of Tina Fey and WKT PR. The obtained quotes may only be used for _______________________.

Journalist may show the completed article as an example of his work, but journalist agrees not to publish any quotes supplied by Tina Fey in any manner without obtaining written consent.

The text may not be used for any merchandising purposes, without prior written permission. Should you fail to strictly comply with the forgoing, our client will have the right to exercise all of his rights and liberties at law and in equity.
There are three possible reasons for rather unusual bit of pre-interview legalese:

1. Tina Fey has run out of material and doesn't want reporters to reveal that she has writers feeding her bon mots via an earpiece.

2. She and her publicists take her and her career way to seriously.

3. She's sick and tired of having her sketches being reported the next day on The View as Sarah Palin quotes.

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