Wednesday, 12 May 2010

Hollywood Babble On & On #507: Pointless Gestures Day

Welcome to the show folks...

Just a couple of quick notes for now:


Ryan Murphy, the creator of the show Glee, has asked people to boycott Newsweek over their strangely nasty piece on gay actors playing straight.

Considering that Newsweek is currently looking for a buyer to stave off bankruptcy, my question is how can a boycott make anything worse for the folks at Newsweek?

It's the equivalent of boycotting sailing on the Titanic as it slowly sinks into the North Atlantic.

My advice to Mr. Murphy: He should have reveled in Newsweek's stinking and sinking with with pithy-bitchy comments like:

"I would have been upset over the Newsweek article, but like everyone else on the planet, I don't read Newsweek."


"It's a good thing such crackpot theories only exist in barely read fringe publications like Newsweek."


"I'd get people to boycott Newsweek, but I can't find anyone who actually buys Newsweek."


You could just write an episode where an idiot sinks the school paper, and tries to revive it by causing an inane and illogical controversy about a gay kid singing a love song to a straight girl in a performance.

That would be pointed, and spare you the effort of trying to flog a dead horse.


The Management Faction in the ongoing war for Lionsgate won a victory when shareholders voted to approve their "Shareholders Rights Plan" otherwise known as the poison pill.

But there's a catch.

Like boycotting the dying Newsweek, it's a pointless gesture.

The Canadian court has ruled the poison pill unusable.

The poison pill is not pinin'! Its passed on! This poison pill is no more! It has ceased to be! It's expired and gone to meet it's maker! It's a stiff! Bereft of life, it rests in peace! If Lionsgate management hadn't nailed it to the perch it'd be pushing up the daisies! It's metabolic processes are now history! It's off the twig! It's kicked the bucket, it's shuffled off it's mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisible!! THIS IS AN EX-POISON PILL!!

So why have the vote?

The Lionsgate Management faction desperately want a public relations win against Icahn in the midst of his bid for the company and released this statement:
“Today’s outcome demonstrates that Lionsgate shareholders are serious about protecting the value of their investment in the Company from financially inadequate, opportunistic and coercive offers such as the one made by the Icahn Group. We urge shareholders to continue to reject the Icahn Group’s offer by NOT tendering their shares, and for those who have, to withdraw them.”
First- Will the Management faction stop using the catchphrase "financially inadequate, opportunistic and coercive" in every public statement? It's annoying. As I've explained before, it may be inadequate in the eyes of management, but it's still more than what the company's been trading for lately. Of course it's opportunistic, all business is opportunistic, and Icahn is saying that management's mishandling is the opportunity he using. And since Icahn's not kidnapping relatives and holding them at gunpoint, and sending severed digits to shareholders, it can't really be called "coercive." The only real threat in this fight is if it leads to a costly proxy battle, and Icahn can claim that it would be the fault of management because of their poison pill games.

Second- This is not, I repeat not, proof positive that the shareholders are 100% behind management. Remember, this is just a pointless, and ultimately harmless gesture, and could be used by some, if not many shareholders, as a ploy to get Icahn to up his bid.

So neither side should count their shareholders before their hatched, this is just the beginning.

Wait a second, my phone's ringing.


I'm being sued by the estates of Graham Chapman and John Cleese!

Isn't John Cleese still alive?

What do you mean that's just a detail?

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