Thursday, 24 November 2011

Hollywood Babble On & On #842: Sexy Dames & Plenty Of Them!

(President & CEO of Casting Couch Productions of Chatsworth CA.)

Yo there, everybody, it's Thanksgiving, that special time of year when Yolanda, my significant other du jour, and I break out some turkey loaf and a fresh box of wine and have ourselves a real holiday feast.

And despite being Canadian, a pack of weirdos who had their Thanksgiving a month ago, Furious D, the guy who regularly runs this blog is taking the day off.  So I "borrowed" his blogger password to make sure you good folks didn't go a night without something to read.

My name's Al Manatee, I'm an award winning movie producer* but you can all call me Duke.  Especially all you lovely ladies out their.... you are out there, right?

Anyway, speaking of the lovely ladies, the dames, the twists, the gals, the broads, the chicks, and the honeys, it seems that some folks at the University of Southern California** have put their thinking caps on and have figured out that Hollywood over-sexualizes women.

Okay, I think we can file that little tidbit under "Well D'uh!"

Of course Hollywood sexualizes women, but it ain't only because "sex sells." I ain't denying that sex sells, it's helping pay for my sweet one bedroom apartment, but I am saying that the constant sexualizing of women by Hollywood has its good parts, and no, I'm not talking about body parts, though some of them are pretty good.

I'm talking about inspiration.

Hollywood's use of women as sex objects provides vital inspiration to the people of the world, both men and women.

They inspire men to become rich and powerful athletes, movie stars, world leaders, and businessmen so they can have a chance with hotties like that.  

They also inspire women to develop the right combination of eating disorders, plastic surgery, and self-esteem issues to become the over-sexualized object of male fantasy that Hollywood, and mankind in general, wants them to be.  You think America's got an obesity problem now, just think of how many fatties there'd be rolling around the country without Hollywood giving them near impossible ideal bodies to live up to.  

You wouldn't be able to walk a foot without stepping on some fat bastard's extra chin! 

If you ask me, and if you're reading this, you are, the whole thing has more positives than Wade Davis' taking a drug test.

Of course, the smarty-pants at USC refuse to see the good side of this issue have their smarty-panties in a twist and are placing the blame on their not being enough chicks behind the camera.

Putting more chicks behind the camera can only start trouble. If they're behind they camera there's the deadly combo of not having to worry about their appearance, and nothing between them and the snacks on the craft-services table. That's a recipe for frikkin' disaster people!

Anyway, in contusion, as the smart folks say, I don't think there's anything wrong with the way things are now.  In fact, if I had my way, there would be a lot more sexualizing going on, if you know what I mean, BOO-YAH!
Anyway, I gotta go, Furious D is getting suspicious...


* Casting Couch productions first and only film release to date Yolanda's Big Bad Bikini Bust-Out was winner of the Special Honorable Mention for Audacity*** at the 2008 Newark Municipal Film Festival.

** USC had some fine honeys roaming the campus the last time I visited in 1999. I don't know how things are now, because I'm sort of banned for life from there, and every other campus in the state of California.

*** The Special Honorable Mention For Audacity came in the form of a court order barring the company from participating in any future film festival.  Anywhere in the USA, in perpetuity.

1 comment:

  1. Thanks for filling in for me tonight.... Sort of....

    Anyway, I'm changing my password to the blog. No offense.