Tuesday 16 July 2013

Hollywood Babble On & On #1045: SnarkNado

It's hot.

I'm feeling cranky.

So it's time for a RANDOM SNARK ATTACK!

Jennifer Lopez is being criticized for earning around $10 million singing for various dictators and tyrants.

I must ask these critics: Where do you think she can go to get that kind of money?

She's got a lavish, fiscally irresponsible, lifestyle to maintain, and she can't expect to get it from album sales and movie deals.

Have you thought about her entourage?

They're people too!

Speaking of leftovers....



Aging bimbo Jenny McCarthy, queen of the anti-vaccination movement, has been named a co-host of The View.
"I have boobs I don't need facts!"

Producers said that this move is part of their ongoing plan to never be taken seriously or considered even remotely intelligent, plus they hope to tap into two demographics, ant-vaccine cranks and 13 year old boys from the 1990s.

They originally hoped to attract the children of anti-vaccine cranks, but they don't appear to live long enough to appeal to advertisers.

Speaking of nut sacks...

The Westboro Baptist Church has announced that they intend to protest at the funeral of Glee star Cory Monteith.

First, if the funeral's being held in his native Canada, the "Church" might have trouble getting in since they're on the Canadian government's shit-list and we don't have things like freedom of speech if that speech annoys or offends anyone.

However, I'm getting tired of people referring to them as a "Church" since their "Church" consists of the relatives of founder Fred Phelps, and about half a dozen others, and at least two of them are probably investigative reporters looking for a story.

That's not a church, that's a nutty bunch of relatives and friends.

3 comments:

  1. I got this shirt at a recent comic con.

    I'm not sure who it's more insulting towards. (the daleks or westboro)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Rainforest Giant here,

    @Nate,
    It is insulting to Timelords like the chick from 'Clueless'.

    @ Furious,
    Expecting China to save Hollywood is like expecting Nigeria to save our financial system. A prince recently found my hairy hide and asked if I would temporarily hold some funds for him and he would let me keep 10%. I have as much chance of seeing that money as Hollywood does anything from China.

    You cannot trust the Chinese to do anything for anyone but the Chinese. Besides, they have their own industry. Wouldn't they work to improve China first? It would make more sense for China to export their movies rather than import Hollywood's possibly subversive and un-Chinese fare.

    Rainforest Giant

    ReplyDelete
  3. And the above obviously belongs to the China thread.

    Rainforest Giant.

    ReplyDelete