Tuesday, 26 November 2013

Hollywood Babble On & On #1093: Snippets Of Stuff.

1. Dorothy Pomerantz At Forbes gives a round-up of some of the worst flops that came out so far in 2013, no doubt soon to be joined by many more.

2. The original prop Maltese Falcon, from the film of the same name starring Humphrey Bogart and directed by John Huston has sold at auction for over $4 million dollars.

In a related story, I really need to raise over $4 million because I made a joke bid at an auction and they took me seriously.

3. Comic book writer Alan Moore emerged from his cave to declare that superhero fans are "emotionally subnormal." 

Which means that either Moore is yanking chains for publicity and his own amusement, or he actually believes Dr. Frederick Wertham was right all along despite what was discovered by researchers, which is sort of the whole premise of his masterpiece Watchmen.

4. MGM wants to do a remake of 80s cult film Road House, which starred the late Patrick Swayze.

First things first.






Now I'll do a little explaining.

The original Road House came out in 1989 and starred Patrick Swayze, hot from mega-hit Dirty Dancing, as a kung-fu super-bouncer out to save the titular tavern from a sinister Ben Gazzara.

When it came out the only nice things said about the film was that it well paced, but the loopy premise, inane dialogue, and general air of total nonsense kept people from calling it a good movie.

The film barely broke even at the box office, but enjoyed a second life on home video and cable television as the sort of film that people can enjoy while stoned or drunk.

This coupled with people ironically calling it "the greatest movie ever made" on social media appears to have convinced MGM that a big budget remake is due.

Oh, dear.


  1. Well, both Roadhouse and Sharknado make good 'date night' movies at our house. Mostly because the Missus likes Swayze and nobody cares if you miss the end of Sharknado.

    Rainforest Giant

  2. Robert the Wise1/12/13 5:24 am

    3 ways to do a ROADHOUSE remake:

    1.Straight remake, slavishly following the original. (What Hollywood will almost certainly do)

    2.Parody the original. Plenty of ammo there.

    3.Make it a serious drama, a day-in-the-life story of a philosophically inclined bouncer (what I thought I was buying a ticket for in 1989).

    However you do it, always remember what Dalton says: "Pain don't hurt".