Hollywood Babble On & On #515: Two Movie Musings

Welcome to the show folks...

AN OPEN LETTER TO MIKE MYERS

Dear Mike.

You don't know me, but I'm one of those smug know it all types that live on the internet dispensing their opinions and advice to people way more wealthy and successful than they are.

I just saw a piece at Movieline that says that, in between cashing Shrek checks, you've been spending a lot of time painting portraits of Colonel Sanders. By Xenu's left testicle, I hope that was a joke, because that's delving into Nicholas Cage territory, and right now no one outside of the IRS wants to go there.

The snark dumper in me wanted to say: "Good, at least he's not doing another Love Guru," but then another part of me smacks that snarky part of me on the back of the head. That other part, located somewhere by my spleen, remembers the great sketch work you did on SNL, and those funny movies like the first Wayne's World, and the first two Austin Powers films (the 3rd one just seemed like a rehash.)

You are capable of doing good work, but it's been a while since you've delivered the sort of quality that made your name in the 90s.

So here's some advice:

1. Don't feel that you must be the total center of everything. I know you want the sort of creative freedom you didn't have during the making of Wayne's World 2, or the Dieter/Sprockets lawsuit.

I know you like to write your own stuff, but when you write your own stuff from the position of dominance that someone like you has, there's no real editor willing to tell you that your piece sucks ass harder than fusion powered Hoover. Do a couple of just acting gigs for others. Find good people to work with and just do the job. Contribute with an open mind, but don't dominate. Working well with others is a good way to keep your face, and not just your voice, in the public eye, and get your mojo back in alignment.

2. Leave the 60s British pop culture stuff alone. I know it was a big influence when you were a kid, but you did it to death with Austin Powers 1-2-3, and flogged that dead horse with The Love Guru. It's done, dusted, move on.

3. Don't go the Eddie Murphy/Steve Martin route and start doing childish comedies for the sake of maintaining a posh lifestyle. Because if you don't follow steps 1 & 2, that will be the only work you'll be getting 10 years from now.

So follow that advice, and you should be fine.

Sincerely
Furious D

NOW WHAT?

There's a rumor going around that the deal for the Weinstein Brothers to regain control of their former baby Miramax is in serious jeopardy. According to The Wrap, Disney is concerned about the "structure of the Weinstein Co."

Which begs the question: Why does Disney care?

I mean the only thing that the House of Mouse should be concerned with is if TWC money-man Ron Burkle's check clears.

In fact, the more poorly structured TWC is the better, for Disney. This is because the last thing Disney wants is a viable competitor being successful with something that failed with them. If TWC crashes, burns, and sinks, all the better for Disney.

So I'm going to take these reports with a grain of salt. As long as Disney gets their money up front and in full, they really shouldn't give a rat's patootie about how badly structured, run, or financed TWC really is.

If Disney wanted anyone to actually do anything with Miramax they'd have made a deal with someone, anyone, else, and not the crumbling Weinstein empire.

So I'm going to have to call bullshit on this one, unless those concerns are coming from Ron Burkle. Then it's a whole different story.